How to Stop Self-Destructive Mind Reading
by Peter Sacco
“I know what you are thinking, and I don’t like it!“, so you say.
“Really? Why would you say that?” she responds.
“I can tell by the look on your face, you are thinking bad things about me,” you respond.
“Really? Actually I was just thinking about how bloated I feel,” she replies, looking less than amused.
Are you a fortune teller, seer, or psychic who thinks they possess this tremendous gift of clairvoyance whereby you can not only predict what other people are thinking, but you can actually read their minds? If so, you are going to learn a lot of miserable lessons in life.
Let’s face it, most people on average can’t control the racing thoughts that change from moment to moment in their own minds, yet you profess that you can read them?
Good luck with that!
People who assert that they can read minds either through believing it, or making the dubious statement to another that they can, often times only assert and focus on the negative – you know assuming the worst in others. Often times, when they believe others are thinking the worst or have bad judgments of them, they are incorrect.
All this does is lead to further misunderstandings, lack of trust and even resentments. This happens all because one decides to “ASS-U-ME” rather than just ask what another person is thinking, or having them clarify things.
Oh and by the way, I am guessing (notice I did not say assuming or reading your mind) that you know what the word assume means broken down into three component parts!
The problem with mind reading besides the obvious that you think you know what the other person is thinking and feeling which often times proves wrong, is that the assume(r) is operating from a negative thinking point of reference. Most people who engage in self-destructive mind reading are usually insecure and project their own limited and negative thinking onto the person they are reading.
When you do this, you are basically stereotyping others based on your own frame of thinking. Just think when you are having a bad day emotionally and trying to read others?
Gee, bet that didn’t work out to well!
The key to overcoming self-destructive mind reading tendencies which will not only chase people away, but destroy relationships as well, is to monitor your thoughts. The thoughts that you are monitoring are the “assumption” thoughts based on your beliefs.
Instead of engaging in conversations using this line of reasoning (destined for failure), the better approach is using a thought process which seeks clarification.
When you are unsure of what another person is implying or feeling, always ask them what they mean! You shouldn’t feel embarrassed whenever you need to seek clarification for something. Better correct than looking more foolish through assuming.
If you are an individual who possesses negative thinking patterns which lead to continual self-destructive mind reading patterns, monitoring your thoughts is paramount. It may seem like a lot of work at first correcting and catching yourself, but over time it will become habitual, just like the negative thought patterns that developed. Hypnosis can help in this area and this is a topic I cover in my own online or in-office confidence and self-esteem hypnosis program then click here or contact me here.
ADDITIONAL RESOURCES RELATED TO DESTRUCTIVE MIND READING:
Peter Andrew Sacco Ph.D.
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